Owning Your Shit
Do you use phrases such as 'you make me feel like...' or 'he makes me feel....'? Have you ever considered how much truth there is in this? How can we possibly be made to feel our own feelings or think our own thoughts? When you know that you, and only you are in command of these things. Of course, our environment and people have an influence but the simple truth is that no person can make you feel a certain way, and this can be a tricky one to land within yourself but also a very powerful enlightenment. Look at the title of this article. Own your shit, take responsibility and know that we all have a part to play, we all can step forward, turn up and put our ego's to one side to move forward from a place of love. We all know that we can't accurately guess or assume why someone might be acting a certain way, and I have learnt that it sure does take up a lot of energy if you try to. Unless both people want to be open, honest and not hold grudges, how someone truly feels most likely will remain an energy they keep to themselves or share with others and not the person involved. This of course can be dangerous and it can be supercharged and given more power, rather than gently released, leading to tension, misunderstanding and resentment amongst others. I'm sure that you have felt it too, what it is like to be on the receiving end of tension as a result of someone assuming you are feeling or thinking in a certain way. Can you imagine a world without blame? Can you imagine how your relationships with people would be transformed if everyone took responsibility and stopped blaming each other and making assumptions? Now, going to this place within yourself can also bring up guilt, shame, resentment and regret. Regret for perhaps blaming another for your upset, your worries, for your unease. Guilt and shame maybe for holding back your love and for assumptions you have about what a person thinks about you. Guilt for knowing that you have a choice to stay in anger, hurt and fear or to move to love, acceptance and respect but are currently stuck and perhaps in a victim mentality. To release yourself from these destructive patterns and move forward, it involves a bit of work by you to explore why you might be blaming, why you might be reacting to words, actions and inactions of others. What is going on with you that finds you feeling sensitive and hurt? What is being triggered deep within you? This most likely has little to do with the current situation or person but is an old wound, and old pattern. Would you like this to be cleared so that you can live a life with more ease? How can you move forward and practise taking responsibility and owning your shit? Decide not to blame anyone for your emotional response. Decide to forgive yourself Honour your emotions. Choose to forgive all those who you feel have hurt or wronged you. Set yourself free Put this into practice by: Meditating- going within, cultivating loving-kindness. Ceremonies for forgiveness and letting go. Work with a counsellor/psychotherapist or complementary therapist to support the energetic releases. Write letters to the people you have bad feelings towards, simpy for the process, burn it and release it so it is safe. When you love yourself, your relationship with everyone changes and when you decide not to give your power away, you are in command and you can remain in command.You will begin to see and accept that how you feel is a response, no one can make you feel a certain way. You are in command. Choose ease, deep ease, peace, calm, steadiness. Build a forcefield around you which allows nothing unwanted to penetrate.Set clear unshakable boundaries to safeguard you and your emotions. Accept responsibility for your part, remember, you have a choice. You can feel more free, calm, at ease. I have found myself at 34 relentless at living a life of ease. A life where I don't blame anyone for my own emotions and thoughts, I recognise my triggers. Where I operate from a place of love and truth, I don't try to get anyone to like me, as I know I cannot. They will resonate with me and see me purely or see me with their assumptions and judgements first. Living by truth means I am being myself, as that is truly the only thing I can do. The other people's opinions or judgements about me will be as they are whether I try to influence it or not. There is significantly more ease in being myself without an agenda. I don't hold motives or agendas, I want to be free. Sometimes I find myself falling into a hole and noticing that my hurt self wants to focus on someone else's negative energy and it's impact on me. But I have to keep bringing it back to me. People often remark to me 'are you always this calm?', 'you look so young', 'you make me feel like I can live the life I want', 'I want to get to where you're at' Several years ago, I chose to say no to stress, I chose ease, joy, freedom but most of all truth. Living by truth, with an open heart allows me to take lessons from every day, from my environment and difficult times. These lessons, I share with you, as you too, can absolutely live the life you want.